I've been getting a lot of questions on this matter, some questions I avoid intentionally. Some I answered truthfully and of course honestly.

I've been doing so many virtual things so far. I wrote an article for a body, I get paid. I am blogging, I get paid. I became co-speaker, I get paid. I wrote a review, some I get paid, some I get to try all the free items and free things. I worked with people, which is quite fun. I managed to observe each brains and how they reacted to some issue and whatnots and now I'm focusing on my permanent job. To be honest, it's sickening. I get to wake up each morning, head up to work, waiting for the traffic, reach an office, sit for 8 hours and go home again. At some point, this routine managed to drive me crazy and some makes me sane. In which, I can conclude, it is basic things in life.

Of all the things I mentioned above, it's quantifiable. If I do this, I will get this amount. We tend to forget, an experience that we gained, is priceless.

Back to the root of the topic, this is truly my first job. Working under people, being ordered around, having performance indicator, waiting for the salary every month. Having lunch together. Countless outstations together, until you realized, they are one of the many groups you had in life that is closer at the moment. This is all normal.

I talked to my seniors who work in the field and she being opened telling me, working life is better compared to the student life. Out of thousands people who complain, she was the only who told me that. Yes, working life, we need to navigate our own path, if we don't like our job, we just can quit, we just can do our own things with the conditions you have everything in your life. Apparently, she played psycho.

And what it's like to work outside of our field. Well, if you are a nutritionist, you may a little happy, because you get a little nutrition inside. If you are a dietitian, you are also a little little happy, because you get a little little nutrition. I hope you get what I meant. In fact, what we learnt in university, we don't 100% apply it, or hard to apply even 5% of your knowledge. Simply because you worked out of your field. We can't blame that. It's the reality & reality sucks.

For some people who thinks I led my life happily, well, I think this is the chance where I want to thank you all for thinking like that about me. I just want to stress that,  what you have seen on media is not 100% true. There were times when I get a little down and but I keep posting myself laughing on the InstaStory. Life has its ups and downs.

When my friends told me, they are quite a rubbish simply because they don't have goals in life, so what do I? What am I? Am I rubbish too? The difference between me and them are obvious. They saw what I've done and what I've created and of course I did publicity for that. They even said my life is just perfectly crafted. Well, it's because you saw me in the media, you don't know how riot my heart and my mind are. You don't know how many stressful moments that I've been through. But, it's life. If you are stress means you are alive. Stress-free person is a corpse.

The biggest issue that I've had with my life for the past months was comparing my current life with my past. Where I get pampered with all things I wanted in life, voicing out things and I get what I wanted. And now it's 360 degrees changes. I need to calculate and budget my needs in order to maintain my cash flows. I was sick and it was hard. I underwent a period of depression. I hate to see my salary is only lasts for 2 weeks and the rest of the month, I took my saving accounts. Although it's enough for me to live forever, but, I hate to see no increment. So, I went depressed, and I can't tell my  parents regarding this matter, because I am 24 and I have my ego.

You can't solve the problem if the problem is yourself. So, I stopped comparing. I praised my ego for being ego maniac. Being ego is a good thing. I was ego to tell my parents that I faced a little problem because I know, they won't let me sick on this. The problem was with myself. Yes, I stopped comparing and I faced my future and my reality. I started to do little counting and I survived. Of course, I have a little complaint and all.

So, everyone has their own crisis in life.

Some of the people also told me, I am such a narcissistic and self-obsessed. Well, I admit that. I just love myself. I don't know what my parents fed me back when I was a kid. But, I really love and like myself. (HAHAHAHA, I FEEL FUNNY TYPING THIS). My friends laughed at me when I told them, I am such an independent person, I managed to pass the hurdles and all. They laughed. Well, even they think it was not true, at least I'm telling myself, I am independent and you never know the magic of thinking big. I'm proud that I'm a self obsessed person, because there's no way I will let myself drown. If you say I got a pimple on my face, oh come on, that pimple is pretty, just let it be. If you say, I am stupid, I will question you back, are you sure I'm stupid? Because I think I am clever. HAHAHA. So, something like that. I can't say that I'm not affected by words. I AM ALWAYS GET AFFECTED BY WORDS. WHEN YOU SAID SOMETHING BAD ABOUT ME OR CRITICS ME, I WILL GET AFFECTED. There's no way I could deny that. But, I heal so fast. I get mad at you for 5 mins and once you smile again, I will smile too.

That's the perk of being self-obsessed. When you said somehing bad about me, I will get healed quickly.

Now come back to the root. What I would like to convey is simple. Working, out of your career, is just a matter of terms, whatever they do to you, just take that as a learning process. Do you want to live to master only one thing ?

If you read this, and you think I am super positive, well I'm not. It's hard to be positive. When I'm in a  negative phase, I became negatively toxic.  We can't be 100% positive because we are human. We need balance.

To conclude on my super long essay; I will tell you one funny story about me.

My dad is a contractor and of course he owns a construction company as well. 
Every time we went to Lahad Datu back when I was kid, my dad always told me, 

"You see, that hotel, I was the one who built that" 

So, I was such a proud daughter telling my school friends that my daddy owns a hotel in Lahad Datu. I'm not sure when I started to realize, what my dad meant was; he was the bricklayer of that hotel. HAHAHA

I was so confident enough to spread the words. 

Last but not least. 

In whatever environment we are working with, just think our work is important. 
Always be grateful. 
Although, I'm working out of my field, but still, I have great superiors and co-workers who drive me to face my future. 

You see what my dad taught me was such a good example. 

There's a difference between these three bricklayers, when asked, 
"what are you doing?"

The first one answered: 
Laying brick. 

The second answered: 
Making RM10 for an hour 

The third one answered: 
I'm building the world largest and greatest place.

Basically, they are all bricklayers, what makes them different, is how they portray their job. 

I'm not telling you to accept and redha with our current conditions, but, just learn. 
There's a great thing behind.

Even it's hard to be positive, fake it until you make it,  and makes your environment a first class setting. 

Thanks for reading. 
I'm writing this to motivate myself too. 
Hope you get motivated too.

and be inspired, especially reading about my dad owns a hotel HAHAH. 

Everything in life is quantifiable, but not your experience. 
When you have the opportunity, go for it and grab it. 
It's priceless.